Stop Animation Video Wins Road ID Flat Joe Biker Contest

Ring the Cowbell for Reader Mike F.

He obviously has the world’s smallest cyclocross race course in the world in his front yard!  He’s reader Mike F. and the winner/creative genius of The Best Bike Blog EVER! Flat Joe Biker photo contest presented by Road ID.  Congratulations and thank you Mike.  Enjoy your Road ID e-gift card.  The amount of work that went into this is very humbling. 

Not only does the entry combine a still photo of cycling with Flat Joe Biker and Road ID, it had to take a couple dozen photos, carefully and precisely crafted together to make this stop animation video of a cyclocross tragedy.   

We’d also like to thank all who entered including: Dave R. of Big Dave Sports who put Flat Joe Biker literally on the podium of the Ohio State Masters and Juniors Championships

April and Mitch B. who took Flat Joe to New Orleans for a lovely time at Cafe du Monde.

Jeni R. who toasted the Lumberjack 100 with Flat Joe.  Cheers!

Rod who found a riding partner in Flat Joe while in Tsali.  "We should go that way!"

And, yeah, what the hell, thanks to Adam N.  Even though he showed up late for the ride by sending in a photo this morning after the deadline, he also gets an honorable mention by kitting up to ride the Mid Mountain Trail in Park City with Flat Joe Biker and Road ID.

To learn more about how Road ID can save your ride or pick up your own e-gift card visit Road ID online and/or like the Road ID Facebook page.

What’s next?  The Tour De Rants of course!  More details coming on Tuesday, but you can enter now by leaving a comment (a rant) on this blog post and joining The Best Bike Blog EVER! Tour De Rants peloton p/b Ryders Eyewear.   (Yes, you’ll have to log in with one of the options presented…anonymous comments will not be considered...duh)  The prize: the Ryders Eyewear of your choice.  Ba bam!  Like Ryders on Facebook here.  While I’m diggin’ on the Seeker, find out which style and lens options match your riding and noggin’ at RydersEyewear.com today.

Dude, Where’s My Giant Foam Thumb?

It’s the if-then philosophical algebraic method of cycling.  If you don’t have a spare tube and air, then carry a cell phone.  If you don’t have a cell phone, then ride with friends who do.  If you don’t have any friends…uh…you should either have two Nike’s or a giant foam thumb sticking out of your jersey pocket.

Occasionally I ride with Dude.  Dude’s cool and a steady strong heads up rider.  Dude is new to town and lives in an adjacent neighborhood.  Dude and I aren’t Facebook besties.  Dude doesn’t feed my cats when I go on vacation.  I don’t know Dude’s full story.  Our conversation has never went past paceline pleasantries.  I don’t have Dude’s number nor know his address.  He doesn’t know mine.  We’re like barbell friends, on the opposite ends of the same group ride.  I show up when I need a moderately paced civil ride.  He shows up when he wants to ride with familiar faces.  I’ve been the new dude, dropped between Loveland and Morrow my first year in town and sympathize. 

Dude’s hamstrings and quads are big enough to be featured on the sale poster at the cannibal neighborhood deli.  Friends on the ride marvel at his beef sticks.  Nicknames like Dude-asaurus Rex and Hamhock don’t even come close.  The legs of his shorts should be reinforced with Kevlar.  After a recent ride, he may consider running a motorcycle chain. 

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I equate riding in Northern Kentucky like this.  Take a piece of paper.  Crumple it up in a ball.  Unwad it and there you have a topographical map of NKY.  On your typical everyday Northern Kentucky riser, Dude got up on the pedals, took two stabs and the chain snapped.  Pop.  We turned to see Dude doing the top tube dance of death.  Putting a foot down, he saved it without injury.

“Anybody got a chain tool,” someone asked.

Silence.

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5 riders, an hour and a half from home and no one has a chain tool nor a spare pin nor a quick link.  In our defense, 4 of 5 don’t have the legs to break a chain.  To be sure there wasn’t a pin rattling around somewhere, we checked our saddle bags.  Nope.

“Dude, you got anyone you can call for a ride?”

Nope.

Dude’s new to town, living single in the city.  We’re his friends.  We’re all here.  So we did what any good riding buddies would do.  We left him.

Well not really.  Being at least an hour’s walk from the nearest intersection with a stop light or anything you could remotely call a town, we advised him to sit tight on this tiny road in Nowheresville, KY.  In two hours one of us would come back in a car to pick him up. 

“Dude.  What’s your cell phone number, so we can call and find you when we’re on the way back with the car?”

“I don’t have a cell phone on me.”  Dude quickly added, “Who am I gonna call?”

Win A $35 Road ID Gift Card In Our Flat Joe Biker Pix Contest

We desparately held back the dumb found looks.  He’s serious.  Who’s he gonna call?  Dude was so matter of fact about it.  I tried to wrap my head around the fact that, if it wasn’t for us, he was completely prepared to walk home, like it was no big deal.  We figured he was at least 27 miles or a brisk six hour walk from home in bike shoes, 90 degree weather, with one water bottle.  Dude started asking about the fastest route back by foot.  If that’s what had to be done, he would’ve done it. 

Thankfully, another dude on the ride had enough time in his Sunday schedule to run back out in the car to save Dude’s day.  The thing is, and Dude specified before we pedaled off, Dude didn’t want a ride.  He asked for either a spare chain or the tools to fix it with.  That’s exactly what happened.  After sitting in spandex at the side of the rural NKY road for two hours not looking out of place at all, another dude drove back fixed Dude’s chain and Dude rode home.  

Things Your Garmin Can’t Capture for $500 Alex-Flat Joe Biker Early Photo Contest Entries

Mike Fun With Photoshop

Morning fog hides the bridge on the Ohio.  A four foot garter snake suns on the trail.  Your buddy’s conversation makes your 22mph effort seem like 17.  Those are the things that stick in your melon when someone asks, “How was your ride?”  That’s why I think, after only a week, the Road ID Flat Joe Biker contest is off to a great start.  You want to share those moments that your Garmin can’t capture.  I wish you were here to see this!  Flat Joe Biker is almost like having a friend on the trail or on your wheel…almost.  It’s the Kewpie doll for the cyclist.  The contest ends a week from Thursday, and I’m already impressed and humbled to be a part of your adventure.  Thank you and keep the photos coming.  Contest details in the upper right hand column of the page.

Jeni-Lumberjack 100

In a way, I do feel like I was at the Lumberjack 100 with reader Jeni and friends this weekend.  Not like I’m a snooty art snob, but her entry featuring Flat Joe Biker in the commemorative Founder’s Ale pint glass captures the event perfectly.  No matter how good or bad your showing, that’s the real trophy.  It’s probably out of frame, but I bet there’s a friend close-by lubing a chain and simultaneously drinking a beer, plastic grocery bags of energy mix and gallon water jugs on the counter, an iPod playing, gross dirt in the bottom of the shower, jersey’s hung up to dry on the stairs to the loft, a view of the Michigan countryside out the cabin window, and someone on the couch watching a grainy local newscast.

Big Dave Sports Masters 40+ Podium

While I eschewed the Ohio State Masters Road Championships in favor of a mountain bike race that ended up getting rained out, Big Dave put Flat Joe Biker on the Podium.  Seriously.  See the bottom of the photo.  While I’m not worthy of stepping on the Masters 40+ podium with these local hammers, I’ve certainly raced against each one of them at some time or another and know the feeling of raising your hands in the air.  Our judges are super impressed with Big Dave’s attention to detail, one big Flat Joe Biker for the top step…three Gu sized Flat Joe Biker’s for bronze.       

Rod-Tsali Overlook

It appears Rod took Flat Joe Biker to Tsali and Waterrock Knob in and around TN and NC.  3-D Joe Biker loves Tsali.  You got the lake, the cliff side, the bermed corners, and the color contrast of the red earth on blue water.  Tsali is a great trail to ride.  You miss so much if you only race there.  Rods photo makes me want to stop on an overlook and pull the sandwich out of my Hydrapak.  Thank you Rod.

We’ll announce a winner on Friday, July 1^st.  In the meantime, take Flat Joe Biker on your next adventure and upload it to our Facebook page for your chance to win a $35 Road ID e-gift card!

Win a Road ID! Enter the Flat Joe Biker Photo Contest

Click, Print and Win!

I’d love to go to Iron Man in Idaho, kayaking in da U.P. of Michigan, and mountain bike in Pisgah.  That’s a lot for three weeks, but not for Flat Joe Biker.  Even though he’s two dimensional and can’t swim, Flat Joe Biker floats, doesn’t require sunscreen or a passport, fits in a jersey pocket, doesn’t have a real job, doesn’t cry when he gets lost, and makes your Facebook adventure posting so much more fun!  Tell a friend to like us on Facebook and enter.

Enter the Flat Joe Biker Photo Contest and you could win a $35 Road ID e-gift card.  Here’s how it works:

PRINT your incredibly handsome Flat Joe Biker from this Flickr link or above image.  Click and print the page.

AFFIX Flat Joe Biker to a piece of cardboard with staples, glue, tape or chewed up hunks of energy bars.

CUT Flat Joe Biker out, leaving a handle at the bottom.  A triangle shape works best.  Lamination and wetsuits are optional.

Flat Joe Biker On Tour in Northern Kentucky

SNAP a photo with Flat Joe Biker on your next adventure.  It doesn’t have to be cycling related or far away.  Be a tourist in your own hometown.  

POST your Flat Joe Biker photo to The Best Bike Blog Ever’s Facebook page (link here) before Midnight, on Thursday June 30^th.

WIN! The Best Flat Joe Biker Photo EVER will be chosen on Friday, July 1^st and awarded the $35 Road ID Gift Card via email.

Pretty Swanky Prize eh?  Thanks Road ID!

In the meantime, visit the Road ID website and see all the great things you can get for $35.  From Firefly safety lights and laces to Road ID Wrist ID’s and accessories, you’ll find something you can use.  It’s more than an ID.  Your Road ID can list emergency contact information, even a note to take care of your pets if you get into trouble.  Now get out there and have some fun with Flat Joe Biker and Road ID.  Special thanks to James Billiter for Flat Joe Biker artwork.