RUA SANDBAGGER: The Test

Are you racing in a category where there really isn’t a higher category?
Yes (you can’t be a sandbagger)
No (you could be a sandbagger)

Did you pack a podium jersey in your bag the morning before the race?
Yes (you could be a sandbagger)
No (you still could be a sandbagger)

Can you easily recall your user names and passwords for all the cycling forums and websites, but have trouble recalling the name of your local USA Cycling Rep, their email address and exactly how many points are required to an upgrade to the next category?
Yes (you could be a sandbagger)
No (you still could be a sandbagger, but we’re starting to doubt it)

Have you won the last 4 or 5 races without wiping a single string cheese noodle of snot on your glove?
Yes (you could be a sandbagger)
No (if you still won, albeit a little booger-ish, or don't wear gloves because it wouldn't look pro at the finish line…you still could be a sandbagger)

When you won your last of those races, was there complete silence at the finish line, but roaring cheers for a slobbering soul who finished behind you?
Yes (you could be a sandbagger)
No (you still could be a sandbagger, if the person cheering was someone who promised they’d buy lunch or kick in for gas on the way home)

When you won the last time, did you have time to change into your “podium jersey” before the person behind you crossed the finish line?
Yes (you could be a sandbagger)
No (you still could be a sandbagger, and so could the person who finished behind you or if you eased up mid-race so you wouldn’t lap someone who might call you out as a sandbagger)

After you won the 4th or 5th race this season, did your car develop a flat tire before you left the race venue again?

Yes (you might be getting a subtle message that you could be a sandbagger)
No (you might have run-flat tires, and could still be a sandbagger)

Do you have a pit bike, pit wheels, pit wash kit, pit tools, pit mechanic, pit picnic basket and change bikes every lap because you have such a lead on the 2nd place rider that you thought you should get some practice on your other bike?
Yes (cough) Sandbagger. What?
No You still could be a sandbagger if the thought has crossed your mind

When you won, did you sort-of, you know, dial back the extension of the fist pump?
Yes (you could be a sandbagger)
No (you still could be a sandbagger and might also enjoy stealing candy from children at Christmas too)

While leading the last lap and you went through the particularly tough sand section of the course, could you have sworn you heard the word “sand” and thought for a second that spectators might not be discussing how deep the sand was?
Yes (you could be a sandbagger)
No (you still could be a sandbagger and your $300 helmet might be on too tight causing constriction of the ear canal)

When you won your races this year, have you pointed at your jersey, pumped your fist in the air, raised your hands, pulled out and kissed a picture of a family member, but the last time you won you realized you were fresh out of animated finish line celebrations?
Yes (you might consider getting an upgrade before your tires are flat again this weekend)
No You still could be a sandbagger, just not a creative one

Now that you’ve won four or five races this season, are you considering racing the next race say on platform pedals, without a saddle and with three cameras mounted on your bike to catch all the action of the extra challenge?
Yes (you might be a sandbagger and not even realize that it takes less time to email you results for an upgrade than it does to find the platform pedals in the bin on your home shop shelf)
No (you still could be a sandbagger with only two vanity cameras to record yourself riding your bike)

Did you feel that the above list of questions was not funny at all and hit a little too close to home?
Yes Get your upgrade
No Keep racing till you get enough good finishes to get the upgrade points. You don’t have to be winning races to be a sandbagger, because sandbaggers who take more than their share of wins breed sandbaggers who take more than their fair share of the lower steps of the podium. Seriously enjoy your few weeks at the front end of the lower category race. Feel pimp in your collection of free socks and swag. Then, get your upgrade, report to the next higher category for your beating and let someone else enjoy elation when they cross the finish line. Repeat until the answer to the first question is yes.

Wezembeek-oppem Belgium Hello!

It’s slightly 12-year-oldish to celebrate a one month anniversary, but after the switch from Joe Biker on AOL on October 8th, this blog has been up and running on blogger for just about a month and I am absolutely blown away over the numbers of new readers and returning readers. Moreover, it's pretty cool to have an insight into who and where you are. From the one person in Wezembeek-oppem Belgium to a handful in Dayton, Ohio USA, thanks for reading and thanks for moving with me. Happy Anniversary, I hope you enjoy your cake! (Video above) Cycling and writing certainly makes me a happy person and I hope reading this blog makes you happy to be a cyclist too. Thank you.

When I first set up this blog, I signed up for a service that tracks readership. It’s that little counter at the bottom. No, I can’t tell your name or if you lube your chamois, but I do know the country/state/city where you have your computer hooked up. I can tell if you came over from the link on Two Johns Podcast, a cycling forum, Google, or in a round about way just have it bookmarked as a favorite. I know what you're wondering. This may seem unbelievable, but no click thrus have come from or went to naked websites. Bike porn on the other hand, well that's what you're all about. Since the internet is usually a very personal thing, I thought you might like to know who else is reading The Best Bike Blog Ever with you. Below are some stats and trends I’ve pulled from the data for roughly the first month of this blog, from October 8th through November 5th, 2008.

The Basics:
Page Views (number of times viewed by anybody or anything): 1481
Unique Views (actual people page views, including returns) 971
First Time Visitors (Real people) 685
Returning Visitors (People that actually came back for more) 286

What's the Big Deal?
Monday’s are the biggest days, followed by the days with new posts. Thanks for subscribing, becoming a “follower,” and making it a favorite in your browser. Like coming back to work from a weekend of “Fight Club,” you obviously have an appetite for race news, stories, pictures and videos the Monday after race weekends. October 13th was the day after the big Cincinnati UCI3 weekend and there were 162 page views and 97 unique views. Pretty cool!

Where Did You Come From?
Big thanks to the websites and blogs who have added a link. The Two Johns Podcast has provided the most click-thrus. I have it on my I-tunes and you should too. Thanks to those involved in the OVCX series. The biggest days have been the two Monday’s after the UCI race weekends where the race reports lived on The Best Bike Blog Ever with a click through from Cycling News, Daily Peloton, Velo News, Cyclocross World, CX Magazine, the OVCX main site and the Cincinnati UCI 3 blog.

Where Did You Go?
Most readers checked out the race photos at Jeff Jakucyk’s site. After that it’s the Two John’s Podcast, CX Magazine, Steve Tilford and Molly Cameron’s Blog, BioWheels website, Belgium Knee Warmers, and of course one of my favorites, Fat Cyclist. Links on the right.

Where Are You?
72% of readers are from Ohio, Kentucky and Indiana, which I reckon, means 28% of readers, roughly 300ish, ain’t from these parts.

From These Parts:
Cincinnati leads the pack, followed by Florence KY, Louisville KY, Newport KY, Mainville OH, Lawrenceburg IN, and Dayton OH

Readers Abroad:
Canada, Spain, Belgium, Germany, Czech Republic, Greece

Larger Cities:
Chicago, Los Angeles, San Diego, San Francisco, Boston, Montreal, Portland, Nashville, Pittsburg, Lexington, Madrid, Indianapolis, San Antonio, Milwaukee, Austin, Kansas City, Athens, Oakland, St. Paul

Places That Sound Like I Should Visit With A Bike:
Mountain Lake MN, Sandy UT, Grand Junction CO, Wezembeek-oppem Belgium

I Know Where Some of You Work:
I can tell if you used your work computer based on the IP address. Don’t sweat it. Your secret’s safe with me. Thanks for taking your coffee break with The Best Bike Blog Ever.