Choosing Cycling Socks: Win with Pearl Izumi

Win Pearl Izumi Socks Below

Admit it.  When you ride past a store window you look at your reflection, your flat-backed position, your dandy color coordinatedness.  In your best Dave Chappelle voice you shake your head and say, “Mmm.  Damn.  I’m one fine looking two-wheeled specimen.”  Like fly-fishing, cycling is half fashion show.  Rolling past Cincinnati’s Verdin bell and clock factory on Riverside Drive, I checked myself out in the reflection of the blacked out windows.  Holy hell!  My socks were as hideous as rubber waders.  Tall white socks with light blue stripes stuck out of the top of my red accented jet black Pearl Izumi shoes like aero bars on a group ride.  It was a triple-snap-clash sista. 

My Team Jersey

Getting ready for a work meeting, my wife stands in front of the full length mirror.  She kicks off one pair of shoes for another, keeps the bag, but ditches the belt.  She asks if the shirt looks better tucked in a little or a lot.  “A little tucked in,” I answer.  There’d be a lot less dorky looking male cyclists if they took a tip from a primping business woman and wheeled their entire ensemble (bike, shorts, jersey, helmet, shoes, sunglasses and all) in front of a full length mirror. 

Drunk Artist Rendering of Perfect Sock

Instead of learning from my wife, my fashion feeble man brain thought I needed tall blue cycling socks…you know, to match my blue and white BioWheels team kit.  I typed the exact phrase into the image search of Yahoo.  Magically 300 pictures of tall blue socks appeared in every shade, length and color combination imaginable.  Row by row, page by page, I dismissed every last one of them as too aqua, too tall for UCI, not enough style.  I went so far as to drink 3 beers and design the perfect sock with Microsoft Crayon 2.0.

I was Mister Pitt, Elaine’s incessantly picky boss in a sock buying episode of TV’s Seinfeld.  He screams, “I want a decent sock that’s comfortable THAT WILL STAY ON MY FOOT!”  Mister Pitt proves what has eluded scientists for centuries.  The fashion part of the male brain can only decipher two variables, in his case, comfort and tightness.  Shorts match jersey.  Bar tape matches bike.  Socks match team kit.  Throw in patterns, design, helmets, shoes, gloves and glasses and the male fashion brain drops to its knees like Elaine, covers its head and screams away the impending frustration induced aneurism.  Hence, most men end up with two pair of work shoes, black and brown. 

Socks Bridge Jersey & Shorts to Shoes & Bike

Two pair of shoes!  That was the key right there.  I have two pairs of cycling shoes.  My road shoes are black with red accents (at left).  My MTB shoes are white with green accents.  My shoes match my bikes.  I needed socks that bridge the gap between team kit and my bike and shoes.  Like my wife’s belts, shoes and bags, cycling socks tie the ensemble together.  I virtually rolled each look in front of the full length mirror.  I ended up choosing three pair of socks, one for each look …road, cyclocross and mountain. 

WIN THREE PAIR OF SOCKS FROM PEARL IZUMI:

1-Consider your three favorite cycling looks: road, mountain, cyclocross.

2-Click here and choose 3 pair of Pearl Izumi socks to complete your outfits.

3-Post a comment with your 3 choices (style/color/size) by 11:59p 7/25/12.

RULES OF THE ROAD: Winner will be chosen randomly from all entries.  “Anonymous” comment entries will not be considered.  Please be aware that we’ll need to get in touch with you, so include an email in your profile and/or “like” us on Facebook so we can get in touch with you if need be.  Winner will be announced on 7/26/12.  Good luck and thanks for reading!

#STRAVA Making Monuments-Killing KOMs

The automatic door shooshed opened and the peloton raced in backward through the checkout.  Paper and plastic bags were tossed in the air and fell like confetti.  A shopping cart crashed into an end-of-aisle display.  They flew around a 99 cent bin of Easter Candy and screamed down aisle five in search of STRAVA Glory, the segment between the pickles and paper towels. 

The Madonna is Always Watching

Redonkulous you say?  Click here and check out this STRAVA segment on a 33 foot rise over two-tenths of a mile on a sliver of neighborhood bike path by a Church in the Cincinnati suburb of Fairfax, which sees more than its fair share of shopping carts and strollers.  If only for safety, but not excluding stupidity, it’s obvious some STRAVA segments shouldn’t be segments.  Before STRAVA existed, I’ve seen guys go up in front lawns on group ride sprints…glory that lasted less than hours.  Madonna del Ghisallo only knows what will happen with eternal STRAVA glory at stake. 

The Original KOM

It’s also obvious, like the well worn Galbraith Road climb on Cincinnati’s east side and the Cleves Time Trial Route on the West side, some segments should be upgraded to Monumental status.  You see before STRAVA existed, there were KOM's.  Yes.  They in fact were wood, wooden monuments of eternal achievement.  I’m pretty certain Ned Overend’s times are still posted on painted wooden signs along the trail up to Sandia Peak outside of Albuquerque, NM.  Now, that’s a monument.  Every locality should have a few and they should be much more spectacular than a neighborhood bike path.

If you’re not in the know, STRAVA is the Lemon Poppy Seed Clif Bar of cycling applications for smart phones and GPS.  It's that addicting.  STRAVA allows users to compete over certain stretches of road and trail for virtual kudos.  It also provides mapping and useable training tools.  If you are a user, don’t be gun-shy about visiting the page for a segment, clicking the “Flag” button and marking it as dangerous or plain ol' goofy.

I’ve had GPS and STRAVA for maybe a month and already I’m exhausted with the amount of segments, segments on neighborhood bike paths, segments in parks, segments with multiple stoplights, segments on the rises of bridges over the Ohio River.  For GPS’s sake, there are even segments within segments.  What we need is a STRAVA Grand Poobah, a King of the KOM’s.  But this is the age of the social network, where peer groups rule the sway.  If I sat down at the STRAVA board room, say as part of their cycling marketing team, here are a few ideas I’d toss out before clipping in for the noon lunch ride in San Francisco. 

When creating a cycling segment, a user should be prompted with a note:

Segments should be uninterrupted without stop signs, stop lights or unmarked intersections.  Unless it is a King of Skid (KOS) contest, segments should not end with a stop light, stop sign or intersection, but rather fall short with enough distance for safe stopping.  Segments should have a 0% chance of having a stroller, a child on a tricycle, somebody using a walker, or a stoned creepy dude walking in its path. 

No virtual KOM crowns or medals should be awarded on segments.  

Ba bam!  While there is a leaderboard for segments and personal bests awarded, KOM crowns and medals will be reserved for a new type of segment called Monuments.  Insert sound of heavenly choir music here.  Positions on basic segment leaderboards last for 1 year and then disappear. 

Beyond Segments, there should be Monuments.  

These are the hardest climbs, hottest contested sprint segments and well known time trial routes.  Based on population, geography or square mileage, maybe each county is allowed a limited number of Monuments of STRAVA.  I think Cincinnati’s Hamilton county could get by with 4, 2 Climbs and 2 Time Trial Monuments.  This is where KOM and podiums are awarded and they are forever.  Imagine vising a city, renting a bike and hitting the local STRAVA Monuments.  That’s pure STRAVA genius.  My resume is on Linked-In.