Friday, February 27, 2009

Getting Shlecked A Letter To The Best Bike Blog Ever About The Shleck Brothers

To: The Best Bike Blog Ever

Fr: Adam (a die hard fan of The Best Bike Blog Ever*)

Re: Getting Shlecked


I'm giving this question to you because of your abilities as a wordsmith. If some said, "That rider just got Schlecked," what would that mean to you? It sounds kind of slanderous and humiliating. I like the sound of it.

For real,


(Frank & Andy Shleck on Alpe d'Huez)

Dearest Adam,

For real and fo shizzle, getting Shlecked is a real adverb and/or verb and it is humiliating.  There are two Shleck brothers in the pro peloton that ride for Saxo Bank, Frank and Andy.  Getting Shlecked actually dates back to the mid 1960’s.  It's a little know fact that Frank and Andy Shleck’s father, Johnny Schleck rode the Tour de France and Vuelta a España between 1965 and 1974.  While I’m not too sure on father Johnny, Frank and Andy are skinny mean climbing beasts with the ability to turn the screws on a climb till you're crying for mama between bouts of the pukes.  To get Schlecked would be to get left a quivering humiliated jello legged mess feeling like you're rolling backwards on a climb while a noodle armed Schleck rides out of sight around the next switchback without even looking back to see if you're still there.  Getting Shlecked could only be considered slanderous if one of the Shleck brothers would happen to drop the other.

The phrase "Getting Shlecked" can apply outside of the Schleck brothers as long it involves someone getting dropped by a skinny mean climbing beast that's so confident in thier climbing abilities that they wouldn't even worry if someone's on their wheel.  However, there arent many riders like the Shleck brothers that I know, especially since most riders in the US are of the beefy sort.  But, say for example I lost a ton of weight and suddenly had pasta arms, weighed 130 in a wet skinsuit, and dropped you like a stone on a long unforgiving climb.  I could say I totally Shlecked you and you could say you totally got Shlecked by that guy who writes The Best Bike Blog Ever.


StevenG said...

Why all the hate for the skinny race? You should let go of all the skinny-semetics man. That is the problem with pro racing they are always trying to bring down the svelte riders. Rasmussen, Ricardo Ricco, were totally set-up and they keep trying to bust the Schlecks just because they are so much faster than those fat 160 pounders. It is all jealousy of a superior physique.

Maggie said...

Schleck's Rock the known Universe and outlying galaxies.!

Joe Biker said...

Not hatin' on the skinnies. Being able to Shleck someone is something to aspire to.